1. You are walking down a rainy road. There is a five hundred dollar bill on the road. You look around and except for someone a half block away, you are alone. You naturally pick up the bill and put it away. That person approaching stops and says, "I saw you pick up that money. It’s mine." You ask how much it was. She asks, "Are you calling me a liar?" What do you do?
I answer patiently, “No, I’m just making sure.”

2. If I were to inspect your guest bathroom, how would I find it?
We dont have a guest room. We have a spare room aka junk room. That is where all the kids’ toys are – imagine the mess.

3. You are given a state of the art bow and arrow. Who or what is your first target (after a lesson or two)?
The chickens who continually poo in my patio.

4. The doorbell rings. The person at the door is wearing a raincoat and you know them. They flash you and are completely naked. Other than your S/O, who would you think would guess you’d find this funny? Why and would you laugh or be pissed off?
I’d laugh because of surprise. If he jacks off in front of me, I’d be pissed.

5. What do you call a male Ladybug?
Still a ladybug?

6. Your friends throw you a party. They’ve got a big national music star to come and perform. It is someone you detest. Do you make believe you like the songs or do you fess up and get the star out of the party?
I will be civil but will not say I like the songs moreso the singer. Id give my friends a break – they threw a party for me!

7. What’s your favorite breed of wild, mean attack dogs?
Pitbull

8. If I called your high school guidance counselor, what would they say about you?
I was a brilliant, bossy underachiever who can have it all but chose to be ordinary – that was the exact same thing said to me.

9. Car A is moving at 63 miles an hour. 4 people are ion the car. Car B is moving at 22 miles an hour. There is a driver and passenger who just came from a hotel while cheating on their spouses. They will crash into each other in exactly 3.5 minutes. What are your fun plans for this Labor day Weekend while these six people meet a brutal and gruesome death??
I will catch up on sleep.

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